Alya Qistina

Saturday, January 29, 2011

Hot to go.


Semuanya bermula hampir sedekad yang lepas. Dekat sebuah sekolah berasrama penuh, semuanya perempuan. Masa tu sekolah tu baru buka. Ada sekelompok students, mereka macam nakal, tak jugak, mereka memang nakal pun. Masa tu nak dekat SPM, dorang macam kita la nak success cemerlang gila tapi mereka guna cara kotor. Aku tak tau macam mana nak cakap tapi dorang main macam spirit panggil roh what ever aku tak reti nak explain, tapi macam tu lah.


So, ada 'makhluk' yang datang menolong. Aku tak pasti apa jadi dengan result SPM dorang tapi sekarang dengar cerita mereka success sangat, belajar sampai overseas, ambil Medicine, Engineering semua.


Tapi lepas mereka grad dari sekolah tu, generation by generation masuk sekolah tu, everything macam okay okay saja. Kadang kadang memang ada benda kacau, tapi tak teruk sangat. Sampai awal tahun 2011. Sebab makin lama makin teruk perangai students kat situ, dulu baik sangat, sampai orang orang sekitar panggil students kat sekolah ni puteri, sekarang orang pun dah tak ramai respect mereka. Tapi dari segi pelajaran, diakui mereka meningkat.


Sekarang, junior makin teruk, langsung tak respect senior. Jalan kalau boleh selisih bahu dengan senior Form 5 kira macam biasa je, tak rasa pape. Kalau dulu, serious memang teruk kena brain wash dengan senior, tak tipu. Jeling sikit dah kena tegur. Sampai cikgu pun dah pening macam mana nak handle budak budak ni sekarang ni.


So, nak dijadikan cerita, dengan keras kepala budak budak ni, fyi, budak budak ni baru Form 2, geng ramainya dalam 12 orang. Lepas bacaan surah malam sebelum tidur (biasanya mereka akan baca surah beramai-ramai sebelum tidur dan pintu pagar asrama akan dikunci), tapi satu malam sebab budak budak ni dah bengang benci yang membuak buak dengan senior, so mereka curi curi keluar pergi library sekolah. Tak pasti macam mana mereka deal dengan segala kunci asrama or library tu.


Bayangkan, tengah tengah malam, pergi library sekolah yang sunyi, konon nak belajar. Tapi Allah nak tunjuk, salah seorang dari mereka kena rasuk. Lembaga yang berusia hampir 200 tahun masuk ke dalam badan student ni sampai budak ni kalau cakap memang macam orang tua, jalan pun sama.


Tapi dorang still pergi jugak library tu every night after bacaan surah malam. Budak yang kena rasuk tu tak kacau orang tapi perangai dia pelik. Sah, memang ada benda dalam badan dia. Perangai dia pelik sangat. Budak tu cakap, generasi student sekarang jahat jahat. Tak macam dulu, masa zaman S*****A jadi ketua pelajar, budak budak baik. Dia kata lagi, dia suka dengan Cikgu N**A sebab dia jaga library baik sangat, nak masuk bagi salam tapi student sekarang yang buat semua ni jadi teruk, korang jahat tidur dan buat bising dalam library.


Yang paling pelik, si budak Form 2 ni, macam tahu everything. Tanya la dia soalan Biology, Add Maths Form 5, semua dia boleh jawab. Sebab benda tu cakap, dia dah lama duduk library, so dia banyak membaca. Tanya la cikgu mana kat sekolah tu, semua dia kenal. Ketua pelajar yang lepas, semua dia tahu.
Mereka interview budak ni for details. Mereka minta budak ni tunjukkan mana papan game spirit yang student lepas main tu, dia cakap belakang sekolah. So mereka pergi cari memang jumpa.


Sekarang benda tu masuk dalam badan budak Form 2 ni sebab nak cari L**DA, orang yang main spirit dekat 10 tahun lepas, sebab nak darah L**DA. Tapi dia tak boleh dekat dengan L**DA. Dia memang dah nak mati, so sebab tu dia nak darah.


Memang seram. Nasib baik masa aku kat sekolah tu, takde apa yang jadi. Ya Allah.

Monday, January 24, 2011

smile.


I've received this sheet of paper 4 weeks ago, clearly by tears. Not that happy, surprised tears, you see. I wanna be the last person seeing this letter and be the last person knowing the decision that my parents have made. Because I know, no matter how hard effort that I put to make this letter to a place that I want, I'll never make it happen. It's just that, well I know I can put this letter in the frame and let it just hang inside my room sadly. I can't go and I won't go.


Indonesia. Not because of the distance. I would dying for my degree, which exactly equal to my future, obviously. I would go anywhere it takes to be in pharmacy degree line, clearly not Malaysia, my pointer seems to be too far to fit into it. It's not the pharmacist tittle or salary income that matter most, I wanna put myself in higher education level than that I was before. I want education.

Miserable.

Pharmacy is really killing me. Malaysia's new requirements, competiton and bla bla bla. Duh, why didn't I struggle like almost death during diploma, huh? Silly me.

I walking to work everyday, a queasy feeling is like a burden in my stomach, thinking on how my future could be. I was thinking to switch to Medicine line, but my decision seems last for only a week! I went to the hospital, entered several wards for some visit, then I realised I can't stand the condition of being a doctor. I don't know why, I would easily say no to blood and injury! *Vomit.

Come on, big girl. Where did you left your smile? Wear it. There'll always be a time to learn.

Monday, January 17, 2011

Kalau nak baca sangat post yang korang panggil whatever tu, baca lah ni. Baca.

Aku nak cakap sikit. Pasal blog ni. Bukan apa, aku cuma tak puas hati, aku bengang. Bukan sekali tapi dah banyak kali, masalah yang timbul sebab ada yang tak puas hati dengan blog ni. Ni, blog aku ni.

Korang tak puas hati aku tak tahu kenapa. Yang aku tahu, aku menulis pasal aku. Pernah aku menulis macam mana ex boyfriend kau lari kejar perempuan lain? Pernah aku cerita kau fail berapa banyak paper? Pernah aku cerita kau curang dengan siapa? Pernah aku cerita apa orang lain kutuk kau? Ada aku kutuk kau kat sini? Sorry, kau ingat aku berminat pasal kau?

Sebab korang rasa korang perfect sangat macam kalau korang ada blog memang boleh kalah Tun M or Hanis Zalikha punya blog ke? Sebab korang rasa life korang lagi cool? Sebab tu ke korang kutuk blog aku? Ada juga yang kutuk writing aku, apa korang nak rasa terhadap every post aku, suka hati korang lah. Nak kutuk? Silakan, selagi mahu menjadi musuh aku sebab aku masih bijak bezakan kutukan membina dengan tak. Sebab, kalau kau baik sangat dengan aku pun, tapi belakang lain cerita, apa hal babe? Ini spesis paling tak ada maruah, depan bukan main baik sokong-kau-buat-apa-sahaja, belakang apa cerita bai?

Aku tak kisah dengan kritikan membina atau any positive comments pasal every writing aku sebab aku tahu aku bukan penulis yang bagus dan ini lah masa untuk belajar. Tapi apa jadah nak kutuk aktiviti aku, korang boleh terima tak kalau kawan baik sendiri cakap dengan orang lain; 'Bencinya tengok dia webcam dengan Meerul' atau 'Euw please lah, bukan dia sorang yang shopping dalam dunia ni'. 'Bajetnya'. 'Whatevernya. 'Eleh setakat kasut Vincci, apa barang'.

Sabarlah hati.

Monday, January 10, 2011

Mine

Right after Anugerah Juara Lagu 25 ended by announcing Ana Raffali- Tolong Ingatkan Aku as the first place winner last night, everybody was updating their Facebook status.


" Apesal Ana Raffali?"


" Buang masa je tengok AJL"


-__-


Why people keep condemned her? I just don't get it. Come on Malaysians, we'd always make a fuss over a small thing, don't we? I agree that Ana Raffali still needs too many things to learn of. She can't even pronounces her lyrics well. Okay I know that she's a English UiTM Debater but she was singing a Malay song and for real, I was barely able to hear what she was singing, even in a radio too!



Never mind. She's talented and she was forgiven for that.


Because Faizal Tahir never made me dissapointed. And he was awesome too, trust me. You know why, because we'd share the same birthday dateee!


Oh by the way, speaking of birthday date, I've got a new year present from my sweetheart muah muah Ameerul Ashraf. He was switching to Celcom 1+5 package, as you guys had suggested to us and he was the one who settled everything from bill sign in registration, picking numbers and so on. He picked the number for me too.


"You, dah settle. Number you baik punyaaaaaaaaa"


"Yea? Berapa?"


"01x-xxx2610"


"Oh okay okay, thanks dear"


"Hah lupa lah tu, 2610 kan birthday you"


Haha Ameerul can be so comel sometimes. Thanks dear.



Happy 9th month anniversary. You are the best thing that's ever been mine. ILY.

Saturday, January 8, 2011

2011

It’s been a week that we‘ve reached a new year and I only have a time to update my blog. Poor me, practical training always leaves me breathless.

HAPPY NEW YEAR 2011 guys.

I wish this new year could bring me anything that I wish for. Err that’s too much I know. I pray to Allah for His blessing and I hope He’ll keep me and my family within a group of persons that He loves. I wish Allah grows my heart beautifully with iman and I wish myself not to miss my prayers. Insyaallah.

I began 2011 with a huge decision when I’ve decided not to further my degree. Degree in Pharmacy really kills everyone. Because if you ask my friends, they’ll say I was the one who tried really hard to make sure I enroll well in degree right after I finish my diploma. I admit that I tried so hard to get as many information regarding my degree. I called as many authorities, spent almost 7 days in every week to seek for the info, surfed a lot about education’s financing, contacted almost everyone, I even surveyed for my targeted campus for degree, been crying for simple things because I was really afraid if I can’t pursue my degree. And I ended up crying when I decided not to do it. No degree after diploma which is the saddest thing in my life.

How I plan my 2011, I’ll be finishing my internship around June. April 2011 could be my most important month because I’ll go for the presentation of my last final project and believe me, I’ve already designed my outfit for it. Duh, girls these days…

Right after I finish my diploma, I HAVE to work for a year. Yes I have to, don’t ask me why because you better ask it to UiTM or maybe to my dad personally. Because he decides so, and I know I’m such a good daughter. Enough said.

And after a year, let’s say hello to DEGREE IN PHARMACY. Yeeeehaaaa!

2010 was too sweet to remember. It left me as a strong, independent girl. I believed I can achieved almost everything when I made most of them. I started 2010 with pride when I said no to my unfaithful ex boyfriend and I moved on. I’ve never thought broke up will leave me in so much better condition. I’ve got Dean Award which really worth my efforts. I found myself more systematic in financing management, that’s exclude when the sales came (still with the same habit year by year). I appreciated and thankful that I’ve had such supportive friends, who willing to be with me through thick and thin. My family’s condition was so much better and I’ve got a new sweet boyfriend though. Hi Ameerul Ashraf, if you’re happen to be reading this post, please fulfill my 2011 with love.

Ya Allah, please let me be stronger and fill my heart with patience to face all of your obstacles. Keep me and my family in a good way. Don’t let us go to the wrong paths. Guide us in Your way, Ya Allah. Amin.