Alya Qistina

Saturday, January 9, 2016


What inspire you to success in your career/field?

For me, none. I have no specific goals in life. I just want to achieve my 10-years ambition, which is to be a pharmacist (yes, that long. Been wanting to be a pharmacist since I was 16). And now, I wish to build a hospital, or err is it too high? Hahaha.

How I developed my interest in this. I once saw a flyer from UiTM's Faculty of Pharmacy on the notice board at my school.The flyer neatly described the requirement the faculty needed for those who were interested to study a degree in pharmacy. I didn't know how it got to attach there. But basically I stole it from the notice board and pasted it on my study desk. And made it an inspiration for me to be one.

Because for 16-year-old me, being pharmacist might be cool. You can still dressed up as you like (I imagined myself in a kebaya wearing high heels with make up brilliantly describing the uses of medicines to people - just a plain stupid me, right hahaha) and still able to get good salary from that. Basically two things that I liked; being pretty and money of my own haha. And just because I read in the newspaper that our country really needed pharmacists supply at that time (2006), so I thought, "Oh, it's probably me you're looking for, lovely country!"

(It has changed now. My intention spreads diverted to educate my people about health and drugs. Literally, maybe. Hahaha).

I remember the conversation I had with my dad in the car when he sent me off to my school. He had this huge ambition of sending me to a medical school but I refused. I said, "What about pharmacy?" and that left my dad in silence. But he finally trusted my interest.

His second attempt to enroll me into a med school was when I filled a form to continue a degree in Egypt. He said, "Oh, Pharmacy will take 5 years? Medicine 6 years? Go for medicine la, only 1 year difference". But I said, "But I've liked Pharmacy". *insert puppy eyes*.

I mean, I didn't expect myself to study so hard in university. Medicine is hard. It is so gonna need too many of studies, especially for a lazy me! Hahaha. That's why if any of my high school friends who managed to pursue a medicine course just got a "Wow" from me haha.

But unfortunately, Pharmacy is nothing less like that. So many things to study. Just so many things to study!!

But it gets so different when you like what you do. I'm still having the same interest towards it as same as 10 years back. (You know I'm just so loyal like that *blows nail*)

So, basically nothing has actually inspired me to progress in my chosen field. It's just my interest. My willing to study. My attraction to what I'm gonna do in the future. Of course, if you ask me, I wish to make my parents happy with what I'm going to achieve, huge or small.

If you ask my colleagues (diploma or degree), they will agree that I don't study that hard. I don't revise books/notes that much. Which I actually tried to do, but I couldn't - I lost my focus. My study pattern is definitely the famous last-minute study *high five* I know you do too! Haha.

But still feel like having a responsibility as a student or as a knowledge seeker, I will pay 101% attention to my lecturers in the classes. No phones, no chatting. My preferable seat is always at the front row. I'd even prefer to sit just in front of the lecturer so he/she can talk to my face directly. I will ask as much questions to them (brilliant to stupid ones. I realized sometimes my questions are stupid, but never mind hahaha).

And read from some outside source about your field. Eg: Current news/issues.

I do all these because I know I won't study later at home haha. At least, I have some efforts, no?

And definitely, a night before the exams, I will be studying like a crazy mental patient, reading through my books as if I could penetrate them. Keep memorizing and memorizing and memorizing. Sleep only 1 hour. Sigh. (I'd always wanna change, but I can't)

But I'm glad to know that I'm progressed from 10 years back. When I look at how much I struggled for this, I literally can cry. Just too bitter. And too sweet. Mixed feelings.

So this post actually comes out just because I am in the exam mode now. I'm done with 2 papers, still have 5 more than. Sigh.

Just a picture of me getting an award for my academic achievement months ago. *cringes* 

Monday, January 4, 2016

inside out

Just my second animated movie for 2016. Or the second for the rest of my life hahaha.

Well, how should I explain this. After I watch Home, I kinda have a trust on these sort of movies. So I went to see my housemate who is the source of all movies (hehehe) to get a new supply of good movie.

Unbelievably, I asked, "You have anything like Home?"

They laughed. Home was sooooo fun. I wanna have the same vibes again as when I watched Home.

She has a lot of animated movie. But she suggested Inside Out (2015).

Well, we watched it happily despite of the fact that we had an exam 2 days after that.

It was fun. One minute, I could laughed crazily over cute characters and the next minute I'd felt rather sad watching the family got apart. I'm not gonna narrate the whole story to you guys because I believe you guys have actually watched this. I am always far left behind in this category hahaha.

So now, what movie is next?

Saturday, January 2, 2016

new house

I wrote before about how my house owner 'kicked us out' from my current rental house. So, we needed to look for a new house to live in. Like homeless people, we went around the whole neighborhood searching for any potential houses. We asked local people around. Using as many connections as we had. Exhausted.

We went for so many potential houses. Just to find that they weren't really as potential as we thought. Really, they lacked so many things compared to our old house. Too far. Too dark. Unfamiliar neighborhood. Too expensive.


We had minor headache episodes for a month just thinking about this hahaha.

So, one day, my classmate called me. He said, his house owner was looking for female tenants. I said, we're going to have a look at the house first. My first impression was, "Hmm this is not that bad, but my old house is far way better".

But we really had no choice! The dateline was so near. So, we desperately said, "Okay, we are taking this house. Deposit is paid next week".

Just. Like. That.

Thank god that this new house owner is kind of generous (so far haha), she painted our house neatly to welcome us. So it seems like a new house now. She seems so nice and friendly. And since she lives just upstairs to our house (still on the same building), so she can always come to pay a visit to our house. Things I often hear so far is "Alhamdulillah, helwah giddan. Kuwaisy". (Alhamdulillah, so nice. Good).

Because female tenants take care of the house nicely, of course. Hahaha.

Well, actually it happens that my new house is just behind to my old house. It's really close. So I still live at the same neighborhood. Still living in the familiar surrounding, which is so much comfortable for me.

So, I'm now updating from my new house.

Friday, January 1, 2016


Happy new year!

The feeling is as same as I celebrated Awal Muharram few months ago. Welcoming new year is fun. You'd filled with hope and trust towards yourself. You believe you could do better next time. You suddenly have dont-know-where-it-comes-from spirit that tells you to be brave and strong in the future ahead.

I feel that.

I don't have specific new year resolutions or whatever. But I just want to be fat.

To be fat for me is equals to being healthy. I wanna fix my BMI which I've actually tried for years but nothing has came out.

(And as a start, I just finished my heavy breakfast with the last-night's pizzas and KFCs leftover -reallyyyyyyyy healthy hahahaha)

And nothing more that I wish for 2016. I'm just gonna go with the flow and rock every moments of the journey. (I don't buy New Year New Me kind of thing, sorry hahaha)

Well, since we are in the exam season now, plus it is winter, so we don't really spend that much of time outside. I'd rather be at home, wrapping myself with my qissy-smelled blanket, switch the heater on the highest heat flow. Our (housemates) kind of new year celebration was just enjoying some good seafood pizzas and called KFC for delivery and watching some movies.

And also it's rare for me to watch animated movies hahaha. You name it, Despicable Me? No. Frozen? No. Baymax? No. No. No. Stop asking.

My actual kind of movie is always about some working, sophisticated woman who knows how to dress up, have a boyfriend who is finally turns out to be a loser or rich man who suddenly becomes an asshole to his woman and all that these women do is to step up and fight. Or something thrilling and family mode movie.

Much less like The Devil Wears Prada, Bride Wars, We Are The Millers, Maze Runner etc. Animated movie? You kidding?

But last night I did. And I'd never knew it's actually fun. Really fun. This movie called Home.

It's really fun actually. How this alien tries to invade earth and finally befriends with human and they help each other to complete their missions.

I fell in love! Guess it's a good start for 2016?

You mean, I'm slowly turning into a kid?



Thursday, December 31, 2015

unlicensed surgeon

I was a 30-seconds surgeon two days ago.


I had a dental appointment last week. It went so smooth, I even played Fruit Bump while waiting for my turn and passed quite a lot of levels.

My dentist seemed to take all these dental things so seriously that he decided to put all sort of metals in my mouth. Last month he put a thing call nance on my palate, now he puts the same thing on the lower side of my mouth. It doesn't hurt, but when the metal that is wrapping my tooth keeps pressing my gum, well that makes it hurt!

I took it off! I'm so gonna pretend like it comes off naturally. Dr Mahmoud will buy my lies, he's cool like that. Or else, I can't eat for the rest of the month!

And he put some rubber that attached to my two-distant teeth to pull them together. This is painful! My gum is too old for this. My gum couldn't cooperate much, so I'm struggling so hard to bear the pain. Of course, I can't really eat. In fact, I can't even clench my own teeth.

So now I have two different kind of pain. One comes from the additional nance that keeps pressing on my tiny gum. And the other comes from the rubber that tries to pull my teeth closer to each other.

To make it more dramatic, some ulcers suddenly grew.

What I ate for the first 3 days was a porridge. Boring!

I, seriously can't wait to end all of this.

So what happened was, my wire accidentally came off (I swear it just came off naturally, not me doing that this time hehe) and I didn't know how that happened, that wire was embedded inside my gum! For days! Without even me realized it!

Oh damn. I swear that hurt a lot. Massively. But stupid and innocent me just thought that that was a normal braces pain. Cause I just got my braces fixed 2 days before that. So I purely thought that this might be a normal process. And it's okay I could hold the pain. (But sometimes I was so mad at I-don't-know I just closed my eyes really tight I could feel my eyes hot with tears but the tears didn't come out, probably it wasn't sad enough, just anger hahaha)

But 2 or 3 days after that the pain still continued I just wanted to see if there was any progress with my braces, I hold a small mirror right in front of my mouth, and I tried to search for the wire. Well, where was it?

"Oh god, is that the wire? Inside my gum?"

My gum was stabbed by a wire!

I panicked for a second. I was clueless. No wonder it hurt so much.

I tried to pull it from the gum with my bare hand, I failed.

I tried using a needle, not working.

I finally used a scissor, I clamped the end tip of a scissor in between the wire and slowly pulled it out. I could feel the wire moved inside my gum. NOT FUNNY BUT CREEPY!

Magically the pain just reduced by 70%. That's how I became a fake surgeon hahaha.

I felt like crying because the pain was finally reduced. And because I thought I was so strong to bear such pain.

I mean, how do you feel when there's a metal stabbed inside your gum? Is that comfortable to eat?

I felt like I bite on thorns!

And as I'm writing this, the pain caused by the rubber has reduced. I can even bite pizza now.

It's so fun actually to how your teeth progress. I always run my tongue at my teeth to check if they'd move closer or not.

It's been a week now and I think my tooth moves a few centimeters. Or half/quarter centimeters. Or just my hallucinations. Too excited for my teeth! Hahahaha

As Dr Mahmoud finished with the treatment, he showed me his three fingers and said, "See you again next three weeks".

Yeah, see you when I see you.

*continues checking for my teeth gap if they'd get closer*

Wednesday, December 30, 2015

too skinny

I've been receiving this a lot lately.

"Why are you so skinny?" "You need to gain some weight" "I think you are too skinny".

Well it turns out to be true. It means, all they said were all true!

I know! I lost some weight and it is not healthy. My current weight is 34.4 kg. My previous weight was 35 +/- kg. I don't know what happened for me to loss such weight.

People out there are struggling to reduce some weight, while I'm having a headache here on how to gain weight. And the feeling is the same. We all want to be normal! And healthy! I know this is so stressful.

I've always wanted to gain weight, definitely. At least to make my BMI normal again. I eat, of course. I eat quite often. Not a lot but quite often (Only eat a lot at that time of the month). I drink a lot of plain water, which may up to 1000 ml in a day. I'm a big eater of vegetables. I eat fruits.

But I don't exercise. I sleep a lot. I eat anything - no restriction. Junk food and carbonated drinks are included, of course. I sleep late at night. And I keep on being stress over stupid things, like "my pizza doesn't turn out to be a real pizza" or simply just like "I don't have anything to wear" hahaha. Which are not that healthy.

And now when the exam season comes, my appetite has reduced I don't know where she goes. I can stand all day just by drinking a cup of Nescafe. I don't really have an urge to eat.

Plus, with this braces on, it feels so hurt to even bite a rice!

So that sum up my lifestyle.

My friends suggested me few methods on how to gain weight. Try this milk. Try this vitamins. Try this and that. Which I was like, yes, that may work on me! Should I try now?

Well, haven't try anything so far!

And my friends try to calm me down like, "Don't worry, you'll gain some weight when you get married".

Marriage must be fun, huh? Hahaha. You don't need food, you'll just need a love.

Or should I just get married?


Wednesday, December 23, 2015

second baby

If you guys still remember how I fell in love with Fairil here in this novel, I bet you guys still can't forget how amazing the love was. So pure. So exciting.

(Just like how I feel as the real me in the real world).

Wait, she didn't write that novel based on my story, definitely hahaha (it'd be a total miracle if someone would ever write a story about my life - which is a total boring life hahaha). The author was actually a good friend of mine, maybe she liked my name haha.

Okay, so the thing is, my good friend, Admatiza (Eeza) just came out with her latest novel. Wohooo! So thrilling! I knew she was preparing for her second baby and I definitely followed her every progresses, and now tadaaa second novel is born.

In my previous post about her, I wrote about how she managed of juggling her endless work in some of her precious time as a full time student at that particular time and writing a novel at the same time. Of course with the crazy assignments and projects whatsoever.

Now, she's back as a working lady and still be able to write a novel.

She's really progressed!

I'm so thrilled to write about this one (even though she's no longer use my name as a main character, even as a minor character, but never mind Eeza zzz), because I know she's a good writer. Her story will make your heart fluttered. So real and so good.

And let me share her latest novel with you guys. It is called Rindu Menyapa Cinta.

Here's a teaser that Eeza made.

I promise you this will be a good read. Go get a copy guys!